1. When
you go, go alone.
2. Two weeks before you depart, on the night of a new moon, place five grains of
sand in your palm and sleep with them pressed against your cheek.
3. Do not be disturbed if the sand has seemingly vanished by daybreak. This
portends good things.
4. The sand must be from a rocky shore, and you may require a magnifying glass to
count out just five grains. This is vitally important. Any less, and you will
not sleep. Any more than this, and the gods may take displeasure at your
greediness.
5. Wear shoes made only of natural things—this may be difficult and expensive, and
you may have to make the shoes especially for this. If you must have shoes made, try to retain the
services of someone from the Sioux or Navajo Nation—barring that, an excellent Italian shoemaker will suffice. But say nothing of your intentions. Say only
that you need shoes for a wedding which is not a lie. You’ll discover why
this is so when you arrive.
6. On the day of your departure, eat no
seeds and drink only reds as if you were unclean and starved for some
quenching sangria.
7. On this day, if you happen to be in the company of a newborn, a virgin, a
homeless man, or some other sacred being, you might want to reconsider your
plans and leave on the next half-moon instead.
8. Be sure to wash your hands and feet before your departure.
9. Take nothing with you.
10. Be silent.
